Article # 4 "Baby Light My Fire "

Article 4 In The Series of "Baby, Light My Fire" Where to Have Sex The bedroom is the typical place where people have sex. Some people are more adventurous – "christening" each room in a brand new house or having sex outdoors for instance. If you are having trouble finding the time for sex or if neither of you are in the mood for sex these days, try getting away for a few days. Most people find that taking a trip is one of the most sexually liberating things they can do. Who to Have Sex With If you want your relationship to work, you should have sex only with your partner. Sex outside the relationship can destroy it. Sex is an intense, bonding experience. Bringing a third party into the scenario – whether through infidelity or through agreement – can only weaken the bonds that sex helped to create. Your Thoughts, Feelings and Behaviors Thoughts lead to feelings and feelings to behaviors. Therefore, if you are not behaving in a way conducive to romantic feelings, your thoughts are likely to blame. And you can change your thoughts. If you have been thinking negative thoughts about your partner, it is likely that those thoughts will lead to negative behaviors. These negative behaviors undermine your relationship. You need to be able to appreciate your partner's quirks. It would be pretty boring if your spouse or lover was just like you. Don't be like My Fair Lady's Henry Huggins and ask "why can't a lady be more like a man?" Appreciate your lady (or man) for what she is – not for what you are. You should also be aware of trying to make your partner into a clone of your gender. For instance, many women want their spouse to be more romantic, intuitive, communicative, and aware of details. These are feminine traits. Most women want their husbands to be masculine, but then undercut their manhood through pestering them about things that are ultimately feminine. Don't expect your husband to be just another one of your girlfriends. Try to look at your spouse's idiosyncrasies with a sense of humor. If he has a habit of leaving the cabinet doors open, don't get irritated. Lighten up. Think of it as a goofy behavior or an endearing trait. There are real problems in the world. Things like squeezing the toothpaste from the middle or leaving the toilet seat up are just quirky traits. Try not to let them become an 800 pound gorilla in the relationship. Neither your partner nor you are perfect. If you keep that in mind, these thoughts, feelings, and behaviors won't impede your relationship. Practice Being Warm, Upbeat, and Empathetic Most people want to be around other people who are warm and positive, not someone who is constantly complaining and nagging. It's just human nature. Think about this: if you're not fun to be around, why should your husband or wife want to hang around? You can be positive, warm, upbeat, and empathetic regardless of whatever problems you have in your life. It is a choice you can make. Take this test: if you were your partner, would you want to be with yourself? If the answer is no, you need to work on your positive attitude. Put yourself in your partner's shoes and you'll be able to see yourself and your own behaviors much more clearly. Try to start to act like someone you'd like to be with on a daily basis. It will improve your relationship significantly. Tomorrows article will continue the series of "Baby, Light My Fire"